MY FISH IS TOO BRIGHT

(MY GEISHA IS MONSOON AT NIGHT)

warmly stolen but not the ft cursed but not hexed

my imfatic not a point to da neglect motion steez

homie riddle me quickly with yo yo beauty chemistry

a reed in coheed dexteridous symmetry slinks far away in farsi

dialects like fresh wet birth to me crystaline within the

womb she can take the dull pain membrane stretch but not full constraints

she can now take anything in any way but complacency besides her words

I know her brain under youth lines cannot contain her body sustains

the backspace of an organic machine never clocked into the factor_y

hurricane blindfolds perforated at the neck the subject not the victim

I got half an ounce at home but nothing on the streets no meat in our

spitals no gretgreets or regrets dry as sore beds bleed goat bleps we

by which I mean you wrapped in wet sheets bereave a pedastel fragments

by which I migrate in line and terms with the vacant state of the sparrows

and marigolds but in through with this garxden my scent overcomes

forgot where my arms lived if only I could reach out if only I could

pick stems without the germs without the chems without god and with a fuck

of a whole lotta more of your torso ripped in half and sliding sounds

familiarize me with the damed behalf or was that on is what a do over

cold shower coat tails splayed hard across the horizon and burnt nails

scour my teeth sideways the wines better obviously if you

just

dont

let it            breathe

break the cord and electricity i am feeding

on the glass my mouth full if you ask though my answer remains

contortedly optimistic if not for frail syrup adjacent my nerve

flail insides accordingly you nymphatically i could split a croak

if feeding eden posterate something we could rent for free

wheres the body baedae chords play well through the entire song

as if each note is the first for the very last time pass me

so pass me the lime casket the tones in the aching stones

of my spine // my virtue against all better odds cannot contes

t with your better enthecs and what is mine

I must remember I am not better than the salt you pill

swollen lies   but I am addicted to the comfort   so I tran

spose into a full ranging motion fucking flailing   a certain

destruction   consumption gestation beautiful on ly on the dan

ce floor besides you   the music I eat as the bile of your

mother's dying child I just mistook those lazers and lights

for any of those old nights and bile // and I get we both do

better now xxxx those old nights at the time were old

frights we both look back on with an air of supposed upon

each other dispondancy / HATE / but revery

I guess what I'm trying to say is that/yea/we disagreed with

a lot of things/ourselves/ and each other

. . . . . .

I just miss the things we did

because

girl

we fucking did them

together

Child's Pose

I open my eyes to the full emptiness the loud silence

the clean and clear of the right here right now

and a single red thread suspended vertically

just in front of me just out of reach

I raise my palms as a sign of gratitude

in it's reply the thread splits down it's center

the two pieces only visible due to their intense

contrast against the stark and supposed emptiness

with my exhale the threads descend

onto my respective knees coiling into loose spirals

left onto the right / right onto the left

I inhale

the last few events reverse

not quickly nor slowly

simply back and forth with the pacing of my breathing

divine play exists in it's process

there is always enough / much love,

Tes.

a whisking existence

A dreaming earth harbors no expectancy
meteor showers collide with it's deep oceans
volcanoes speak loudly in time and cadence
with one another to the rise and fall of the birth
of new islands changing with no will in their subtlties
the tide levels increase as sea's surface area diminishes
nothing is created and nothing is destroyed
only a wash of change and still the sleeping earth dreams on
not a single question
pure awareness
pure sensation
a dreaming earth harbors
a dreaming world
simply breathes on

Pirates

Gut-wrenching-tear-the-roof-off-set-the-house-on-fire-scream-spit-and-blasphem-bloody-murder-into-the-speakers-screaming-back-louder-than-you-ever-could-sweat-of-my-sweat-blood-of-your-blood-from-the-windows-to-the-walls-every-day-and-every-night-for-all-that-is-holy-and-all-that-is-right-unabashedly-vulnerable-brooding-ViOLENT-ineffable-creating-everything-just-to-destroy-it-and-build-it-back-as-something-even-more-effortless-weightless-sightless-undaunted-deranged-always-sustained-and-all-ways-relentless
LOVE.

SQUiSH

you can't fast forward
through music who's
intention it is / is
to bring attention to
it's
progression.

LiFE
is
BeauTiFuL.

Aurora

Time and space
Form the X & Y
Axis oF valleys
and RidgeS oF our
Location nobody asks
US
Our Mountains are eyelids my
hand into pen to ink turns the paper
before / & right wrong / but not after
of that which feeds us soul and laughter
our faces in the fire / glow / go
to where our mountains are eyelids
looking down
with no grimacing cringes

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 1

Violent Words for Beautiful People

For 'Tasha
and the land of eyes that comes between us
(you know how we do)

ch. 1

*|DISMEMBERED|*

So tonight I found myself alone / by choice / I lapped the humbling belly bottom of a full cup up to the rim with 90 proof lack of a voice / parted my lips to let my breathe set in / I pressed play just to see where the track would go from there / downed the last third of the fourth noun turned verb in a similar curve corked the CabSauv / it was with two spliffs and the first three quarters of the last half of that I heard sounds familiar in the melancholy breeze / maybe it was just the stoned half cut of my state but those dead leaf tones rang off the hook / with frequencies bent not coincidentally to the naked hips of the triptych of my archangels three / torsos light from appendages forgotten not a second thought brought to my head space / for they erased the neck to teach me / and I am learning / truly / the belts books and buckles pages burnt our burden in approximate circumference lasting far from the waist / scars across your nose your own transpose bruises on my cheeks / darker shades fade and wane with the vibration of a classical guitars fullness with sound until emptiness of the strings / eluded confusive as crystal glass or a woman's voice sonaring between the walls of the chambers of my heart and their apartment hands twisting hidden blunts in the stairs shadows across the streets / only the ember glows enough to reflect off my iris at the same time / palms fish eye in the pupil androtoscope muscles cope diagonally / remember the aft forward mentioned streets / salves we spread they're still there and defined in kind we blend in so easily with the cracks in the stained glass / the clouds cover every slab of concrete / brushes and cans / graffiti tags enfrancais / je ne sais pas and must I repeat / carpe diem and a shrouded set of feet paintings of mercenaries no newspapers circulated because we all knew what that means / celestial pelvis in anatomy a child where my jaw and teeth should be / ghostly mother fucker / that’s what I’ll name him / maybe oblique / maybe more P.C. / maybe not shut my trap my cotton mouth grows the crops we need in actuality / yes my sister you know what I mean / and that’s fine cost and pence and repositioned stance slime and a half an easy dance a quarter nickel dime / eliminating the buy or the sell the end or the mid line or the cut of the hard line against my rain my heart pours too / it starts / rolling back counter clock wise numbers diminishing but do not demise / still grimacing in the old lines I retrospectively find luxury in the clairvoyance abounding virtuous but never the purest points of physicality point towards sacred symptoms our rituals we hold in revelry my dearest we didn't discriminate we let it flow just to watch who threw the throwing nest the furthest / a phoenix born in mid air / a man with a woman in a cave with no home an old wolf / the two grasp the backs of each others heads / grapple tightly knotted fistfuls of certainty to tomorrow watch the evolution the natural will of growth of those twist sun kissed mitts of thick and dreaded hair

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 2

Violent Words for Beautiful People

ch. 2

*|BRAP|*

she strode back lit beneath the tundra lunar mountains / a rain of combustibles not the snow to the soft rocks covered / gambit between her teeth / she ground the suits colorsfeverently into sparks coffer valuable as the armor we shed together / first the gauntlets then the breast plate / the gilded slot spattered head piece wheezed distressingly from chin across brow and off her face entirely / her spiraling onyx locks hissed then faded as dying cobras as they came to rest bouncing anti conquer flag motionless with a chasing pace / limitless spit string stung tranquil guise in stature / much akin to four post bed boards with poles the handcuffs glimmered released to ease in the after glow / still warm and almost skin toned remembering the blizzard torched upon them / when our war was haughty and fragrant enough we were split wide in the likeness of heart monitors off beat and the Sahara plains horizon somewhere along our tongues travels from freckled nose to the base of a thick goatee deep with your scent / few happenings on the face of the planet surpass the power to stop time as laughter during sex / messages opaque spanned me like gloves fit eloquent comfort undeniable there is certainly no restraint of these things that I do crave / so I sang songs into her body / hymns flow up stream filling every space of her being exiting out amplified by thechakras her extremities and taut cheeks bludgeoned the space coating moans / bereavement of organic tremulants shattered beyond decibel conception one would swear this cathedral and bell tower were of ancient stories / oral tradition kept in the farthest places of her mind / even thelocal's memories became fanciful expletives sputtered at a rate fluxed as the stones in the market's open walls / chiselings of her crucibles lower abdominal calls resounding continuously with every drop / crashing loudly from the court yards fire fountains and wind falls / if the cobble's cat eyed scrawls could talk the priests swept aside would transcribe tales of public hangings / there hasn't been one for decades butlordy knows what positions righteous men would bend to bring that blindfold back / so I maintain focus by keeping my ear to the leper's lips for it's at the base of the smoke stack that the coals smolder brightest / and no they don't spit fire or spectacle or call out to speak with anyone in particular / even me / but as they enunciate four looping syllables "oms" "for" "the" "poor" resignation as ambient as the black sun's reflection of the clock tower's face onto the empty space where the gallows lived / where the mortar sieved fluent / it's origins being the rock and flagstaff you know trickled here from abroad / her broad shoulders lowered comfortably onto comfort with the same ease their prophets retold her past as if into the future with such clarity those stories became synonymous with omniscience / herferocity with congruence / my superfluous intention / war calls and bed moans / the space between our heavy maul proved the mauls themselves a shield worth erecting

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 3

Violent Words for Beautiful People

ch. 3

*|MOVING PICTURES / ALL SO STILL|*

at first mind's eye polaroid you fragged me near trench sill dominating traffic / left airless / a shudder a childish man humble asunder on shaky knees / my mer de noms were so many until you caught my gaze and true focus of my winds was not necessary (you were sure to remind me of this as you stood tip toe on the tops of my kicks as you pressed your breath against the breadth of my lips) but I deemed a necessity / I deemed a single uplifting catastrophe reign to overturn inspire stars derail / enrapture comfort and confront me for bars last opus strange since four stanzas sounded clairvoyance in amongst the dark wood and brass / droplets sent crimson chaos theorying between the soft curls of hair / continuing the virtue / anti gravity hand held as analog poetry parted between the blades and dew brings coalescence reminiscent of new fronts approached strongly / the words ran like wine pooling imperfectly a cup astounds your navel jewelery and running... running... the many body parts yourboney hips could be construed as / canals / chunnels siphon the sweet between your whispers... quivering bottom lip whispers / sacred space silk folds and fragrant incenses / I dare not even speak for the next six and a half inches of sentence slips soft as farthest stars I know you keep deep / deep deep somewhere between flat stomach and the tail bones up turned cheek / when I touch you I smell you / when I hear you I taste you / when any single sense is engaged all of my senses experience with afractaling love that leaves me knowing what it is to be a part of the self similarity that I see all around me / to look into your eyes and know that we are the same thing / the same being / to know you know this also / I do not simply lose myself in your eyes / I lose everything in everything else / there is no vessel / there are noplaines no pains no vestiges to find round here / no trestles no dope no messages no hope no kinmanship no fear / no threads no kicks or caps no happenings not ever an "it is" never a single perhaps / no constraints no brains no blue skies no conflicts and no remains / to the best of me your windows are as a physical reminder that perfectly personifies what it is to find balance / I lose everything in everything else / and in doing so I gain what I can only iterate as infinity / the 40 in my bag that never empties / my body breaks down the alcohol immaculately in a last ditch attempt to penetrate the toned muscles thread by thread / a loss of definition all reasonable doubt removed within the space of parted lips and utterance met / what it is indictment? these parameters callvicinity no more accurately than a monk and his cloak equal obsidian deep connection / now ask me again and I will tell you what is intimate what is sacred I will tell you what is ZEN.

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 4

Violent Words for Beautiful People

ch. 4

*|INFERNO & THE MIST|*

there is something about the way I love you from a distance / the viscous resistance train tracks attack louder with ever step you take away from me / thickest from another’s mountain peaks out of focus pastel shades degrade massive cliff sides into whatever your subconscious provides / and on this soft morning (bird calls below you the sound of clouds scraping against and through one another above) that provision comes solemn as ape faces in the mist / drawn downwards towards the bottomed out trees like poachers exploding motion the slashing of forests beauty mark blemished empty spaces replaced them with cages old age passed by in solitude and lonely / a vantage point graceless even in the presence likened intelligence fortuitous / so tell me what is relative / the shrewdness of apes rejected the answers slingshot around the planet / the thick creases in their palms told them better choir songs were the ones written by deaf Africans in the after glow of the house fire / bare foot tired / a single dread lock perhaps one of them named it panic / if only the elders had any parables formed from derivatives of what we high rise grown see when the signal falls dead / when the equator experiences frost bites and snow storms we experience the static / it is only in the metro I find my partnership with you pragmatic / without the webs of spinal steel jungle and concrete encapsulate light dodged as to remind and not forget / our solitude is done for / clearly as the enigma's wet hard hand has practiced

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 5

Violent Words for Beautiful People

ch. 5

*|COPPER|*

I am conscious of the empty space forever above me still I find myself in the body chamber and am glad that in these days that means something different / that the single bulb that once resound simply echoed from the rooms of the basement / bounced from door to bar stool to gathered laundry in the corner to concrete wall to stair well to window pane and not at all back again / echoed from the flash of switches blown the breaker out into the black night / across the blue and cut a crescent in the atmosphere leaked out the light / girl we called that shit the moon 'til the day it found the ground
...
and I find that the serpents I let coil around me do a lot more than just change color with the bending of my mood from moment to moment / they slither through my nerves and tell me things from the inside / that most of the time seem to intense to begin to try and describe / and I am learning the difference between what I believe is wrong what is living in the shadows and the beauty of the unknown

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 6

Violent Words for Beautiful People

ch. 6

*|I DID IT FOR YOU|*

as every page folds and tears / as every steam rose from paper coffee cups / mugs overturn / stains set in / the rain continues and the corners of brick buildings swivel in step with your streaming through the streets / every turn of my head / I open my mouth to call out to you a second too late nights still frame shot melancholic slates of my crescent moon hope for you / just one more time / just for four more minutes you said / but sugarbass I'm going to be late if I don't leave
please stay / we can make love all day long
I grasp your right hip shove my face into the crook of your neck breathe you in and spoon you as deep as I can
just for four more minutes
just
four
more minutes

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 7

Violent Words for Beautiful People

ch. 7

*|GALLOW OMEN|*

only the spiral
never the circle

I used to be the circle / the vinyl turning perfectly / I swear I would play that track like murder premeditated even when on other thoughts it never really goes away / it makes me listen ‘til the finish then rewinds itself to where it began only to linger on spinning on point / on yet another moment and on and on and on like linear time has been stolen / I mean on and on and on again endlessly / it would carry on in my head even as I left my bed with the first words and light of day I said / it was there in the background even as I thumbed my way through the papers searching for myrollies / ya know I burn 'em daily / took my place on the morning bus along side early rising yoga students those still lucid from the night before thetweakers and the bookies / their tucked away numbers spelt out the lyrics like closed captioning along the bottom of my sunglasses / there are some secrets that red ink and leather can never hide / I keep the candles in my eyes few and dim my vessel free of sin I glow spectacularly softly / breath as maiden as the voyage I guess I should have learned to swim something besides the doggy / my backstrokeshotty / my singing voice rapid as the breaking notes of knowing there are some songs that just never crest the waves / enough to touch the land before being pulled back out with the sand and the joint roaches sand bag this part of the coast enough to fish tie the cooler waters / ya know it is the spirits of our ancestors that guide land to wet toe side this is where I am meant to be / the revelry of the tide mixing with the fiery hues pages scorched to ash across the warmer waters / surely I have never seen a drop fresh as the whale slaughter since the last night I laid naked on the beach and cried in time with every tug of the moons gravity / my lone light nodding gently forever a perfect silence / flawless blether that lent my pulsing hearts mortality the mechanical simplicity of appreciating whatever sounds bled their way out of the speakers / or out away from the needle scratch yes the subtle noises hold my focus for my ears are feminine as the lace of audio / waiting in the wings if only to caress the echo off the curtains / sustained by a gender akin to skin spent spoken steady tone enough in length to resurrect passion's own vibrato
I am here for the quantum physics bred of sound
I am here for the soul’s geometry
I used to be the circle until the plain on which the third dimension found me
now I know I am the spiral how I know the coil how rhythms depth is fractaling

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 8

Violent Words for Beautiful People

ch. 8

*|BLESSED BE|*

I was the vertices bent by my own conception of surrealism / I blamed the fixation of canvas ablaze on your fascination with Dali / the ladder's corners rounded out to the note of pin pricks tapered a nothing hole in the center / on one end / a viscous syringe / while on the other the rest of the body protruded endlessly from the molars splayed wisdom ways / separate the jaw from hate / the deformation from love we called this serpent's mouth / in lone moments warmed by the crux I had stolen / I found entire worlds sung into being by the conviction we held so dear / so dear / so near to death we came for the realities of the myths we wrote / but that single pricks my jugular / regurgitate myvernacular's rotted one note / just shut your pretty mouth 'cause this is the first time I have ever had to iterate / not that if I hadn't you wouldn't understand my empty hands / but at this point in time a banquet of sounds I can only offer / mirror a difference in line with the silence was so beautiful it was just more than I could bare / and so I iterate / and this is fine / these are mykaleidascoping eyes in the rain of color / these are my crying eyes in the black star's sun / shone heaviest on days devoid of ultra violet / I had only the capacity of believing somewhere between sepia and gray scale and a zodiac personified I would ensnare and gift if only you were the kind of girl who wouldn't weep at the constellation's caging / but you are not / so many things and nothing I can see / light pollution past the atmosphere some say there was one day not a single one of us did not forgot / wishes what I want for in partners bred our documents manifests check marks leave a residue of positivity / what we scrapped from the bottom's bowl trail out far into the merkaba hour / glass refines the sands shimmy out in crisp tones we find a secession no longer wanting / it is the leaving / it is in the filling sloping under currents where the quantity pulls a second glance gloam for foretense glamour stance grades our actions with many airy makeshift symbols / just so many god damn numbers / and I cannot continue them all / so I finish strong with whispers we spoke in unison "fuck it all for we recall the minuscule shapes the dust rearranged our slop and the acrylics glaze our lips under testament unlike any rescue we've collapsed / the base lines clean themselves / now that the art clings to the clouds much differently then before / we let it sleep standing up and leave the wakeful the cushion of the floor / there is purpose here so hesitate not a second longer and dose the drug / bottoms up / what you are to me is an intention deficit deflection / dissect roles defect the fuzz and in on us I'll touch a case of the resonance molds / a screaming acoustic clarity clambered about face / break the banks and when we're caught I will stick you chest wise akimbo er go a lot like the opposite of wounds closing up / and think nothing of it for I know in the same and single instant you will have roughed a gaping hole in the southern pole of my gut... fuck..." my shaking tresses still not bodacious enough / I will take my last dying breath four hundred thousand times and square my ruptured lung adnaseum as that it collapses and rises again not never standing still as a Cretaceous turtle's housing mouth residence / bay windows that are just the bone and ship wreck frame / nothing in between / still condensation accumulates across the glossy eyes / hand prints that will reappear tomorrow upon the turtles resurfacing will tide us closer together then I ever thought was safe / my grace will conceal the retracting stilts I wore to walk an even plane from the top of the ocean to the edge of the shore / your aquatic acquisition and rough carpentry teach me to carve in honesty / my response will always give me away / in just the right light I believe everything you do / just the same way that you did / faith like negative space / the vase and the face / principles taken as rat poison and lace and other over the counter narcotics all the children take / two by fours jammed together with substantial pressure create entire relics without lifting a chisel or nail / no metal involved / only wood / forty one age rings ripple to the swaying of the structure / we move in time with the construction / meditating on the pendulum cursive action of ourselves and it's relevance to that contrary to our child hood belief / we find that development of the land to be a sincerely beautiful progress / manifesting our potential in a tangible form / our intention certain / I was here / architects heard the rolling echo of thunder storms / they dreamt of coffins and woke to a new understanding of the documentation of sound / sine waves read in hooked shapes grasping the side of landscapes from wall to door way / building men dreamt of where the church met the graveyard and woke to cave openings they saw between their fingers / architects closed one eye and breathed through that cuticle space / these were the first mausoleums to house our atmospheres / our conquests of fears / our whole truths laid to rest against our half lies / an atlantis pyramid of sarcophagi laid out the back side as mountains of souls make their way home / maws longing for the surface and sands fine tide / the windful current skews the lens through which we under stifled laughter peering wince eyed jeer in hope that our reflection can possibly penetrate all the way to the ocean floor / taking every layer masked together along with ourselves recognize transparency as a learning tool / we can take this assault from the waves as a beckoning call that we are the same / that we may all ways see the beauty of the universe in the mosaics we unawaringly create / for in the dankest depths of darkness we cannot see where we end or where we begin so we are as endless as we allow ourselves to be / spoke softly in repartee apart from repetition's reputation as a crooning eye / stoned spent enough for that what's ripped the start I wasn't sure what I could be / a bird flown flat lined along the water / trigger sleeves doused thinner with the soaking / your sweater of feathers clung heavily to your glowing frame enough so that you resembled the convex splash of the oceans surface / the sharp edge of glass / the last glimpse of opium from the chamber / the first breath slight as cloud's birth / the masticated clash typhoon driven and pounded two dimensional when your clothing contains a lake full flushed / replenish thank yous for cradling the divots and that you know what's given / dissipating as your teenage profile / in my time I know that mine was thinner / thank you for allowing yourself to be the vanquishing victim plenty a gold full farthing's worth of your supple station's vulnerability / procedures of the new times are the old times accounts / stacked as smoke stack jackets armor of yesteryear / determent and sedentary are my pursing lips bloom to the tune of bombs shattering our sound and over coats / our silence is such a conductor / lightening tuned in to our frequency alone / across every night sky rumors beyond space and time are the electric echo that abounds avoiding ego and that same familiar smother / Nikola is so jealous he reincarnates and suicides over and over for eternity in the hopes he will one day be born our only son or at least a cousin or brother

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 9

Violent Words for Beautiful People

ch. 9

*|DRAP LIKE DROP OR DRAPE WITHOUT THE 'E'|*

Thrice velvet ventriloquism taut time's signature / nine four spread to the snapping of the dropped d's relative clash touching slightly off center / oak neck's the better / midnight poison from the battery / universal like the collective's organic vasectomy of me from what I want to a balanced point of the pretense and what I actually need / that's you babe / pushing me away with one hand free / I grip your other wrist / slit my own with the piano wire tight between your teeth / our wounds pragmatically seething I lashed our bleeding limbs like poe lyrics burnt from the earth up / seedlings planted backwards aft bound / pretty as your shaved legs in fatty pants boister deep fence and still not / sly strut / world wide stylish however purple turned to macabre / a foreign language surprisingly simple in it's reading manual taught us the bomb play / together / we built paths with homes at the ends of them like pistol revolutions / the right key in the wrong lock / and other petering sounds you only hear when it's dead fucking silent and already girl / that's proper / that's loud enough // so sing it again to the broken e string / I know you can hear me / I know that you are listening

V.W.f.B.P. ch. 10

Violent Words for Beautiful People

ch. 10

*|GUTTED|*

so tonight I find myself a lone light nodding gently
beautifully interwoven amongst the candy apple scent of napalm
rising in the face of the etched concrete level cartoon smilings
of multicolored smoke bombs dissipating to the wind of a new day

I can only hope that tomorrow
I will still simply exist
I can only hope that tomorrow
I will still simply...


I must keep reminding myself of this...


multicolored smoke bombs dissipating
to the wind
of a NEW DAY.

SUNSHiNE

Zodiac terms are not my nerves split
not torrential but I can't quit
the stars don't define me
but help to remind me
that I fall in line with what's divine
don't have to take anything
because it's all already been given
I know I can do anything
so everything is already mine
one love infinite facets
what are you but my reflection
holy and bless/ed
it's the same beautiful shit
singing in time with the one pure moment
no difference between me and a tree
and you and what's endless and
positive intention the dirt of the planet
lotus posed I realign my spine
close my eyes and let my energy flow freely
blind you like the first dew catches rainbows
the violet and blue the fractaling hues
no negative affirmations I rhyme on the truth
blind you like a new dime in the sunshine
I'm calling out to you for a new rise
but you don't got to say nothing
this time there will be no words
just collective physical suspension
inversion of the nervous system
supposed through intentional invention
this time I'ma touch the stars
through my spirit through my vision
this time though there will be no words
just steady beating chakras a path and new wisdom

these are my kaleidoscoping eyes in the sunshine
these are / my eyes
these are my eyes in the sunshine
these are / my eyes

this time I am erased by the sunshine
this time there will be no words
but my sound will be heard
by the silence I preserve
every time
I
stop...

can't conduct
unless I restart can't take part
until I bleed out break down
to where the purest the barest
I admit sometimes the scariest
parts of myself can be found
and I find that at my most real
I'm not any different than you
there is only love that's what is real
that's the beauty of truth
one holy moment one unconditional silence
if you ever doubt the beauty of life
you have only to pull back your eyelids
one holy moment one unconditional silence

CHEK IT OUT/
these are my kaleidoscoping eyes in the sunshine
these are / my eyes
these are my eyes in the sunshine
these are / my eyes

this time I am erased by the sunshine
this time there will be no words
but my sound will be heard
by the silence I preserve
every time
I
stop...

Poetry In The Raw

ill hold still my pen and speak again
talk of god and the lions den
come again come see me
in the clouds singing it loud saying it proud
cuz im done trying to write
done trying to write this kind of shit down
there is only the right here right now
and i know that we could own it
we take this assault rework and grace it
so ima drop my pen and speak again
in the moment shed my clothes and maybe then
I will stand purely poised with rhymes bent the words I meant
as every time i step behind the mic i am a druid transcending
every time i slit the stric nine line of this poison kite
fire ant tired blind pirate mind i am befriending
straight through the clouds
second star to the right and straight on til morning
not a single doubt for we are the answers to all the questions
suspended shot straight through twelve thousand and one directions
one hundred thousand injections
one for every mile of blood runnin' through me
point three for every life that has touched me
and one hundred percent for every fleck
of light that has reached through the
shadows plucked my chest open and
sung lessons into my soul that taught
me how to kick start my heart again
jump far and imprint my mark again
revert and born from to combat the dirt again
fight along side my sly smirk again
and let me kick start it's romping heart again
let me in and I'll be friends with me myself and I again
high again I be somewhere where I can't seem to stop again
so I paint a reality for myself of
a somewhere where I can start again
a new present moment
a true immediate experience
a new silence
we are backed by spirits
a bending of what's with us
understanding love honesty
some new connotations
for when you hear
the word victory
satya / truth
sate hitam satyam / the path

and what else is there?
I'm spinning a good yarn
and thus far the tapestry's coming along

I'm singing that bright song and yet ironically
it ain't got no words

still I hope ya heard everything I said
from way over by the crash of the curb
to the slashing of the mosh
the ever loving heat of the pit
to every comfort you found in bed
every sound in every phone in every tone in every head
the message / it remains the same
all ways in it's fullest colors never smothered or too bled

the conflicts for the most part they don't stick
they wash away while their residue sustains
the positivity like silence and chemistry a new mix
softened hues like my sober intoxicated new view
I found a new drink that offers proper cause
to my new bruised and opened eye moves
those not in the know pass off
as a case of public drunkenness

but if love is illicit
then I think I'm just the bandit you're looking for
if it is unlawful to be high as a mother fucker
off my wordless passion I have for every brother
sun shine and moon light and all of creation
then I will gladly don the chains
and steel collar that the fearful have fashioned
and I will wear them 'til the last rising dawn
shake my split end tresses in time with the last note
of the last song the last words spoke / they carry on

desolate but not famished
my love remains but the body has vanished
the chains clamber to the ground / silent
my love speaks loudly / maintains resonance
the atoms never split stronger than the bomb
more resilient than the end
the apocalypse of my bright song

so what else is there?
my silence is proof
my body
not just external
my passion is eternal
as I reach my reply
my love is a fractal

Inspire Each Other

Leon Quest's facebook status on July 25th 2009:
I will layer flavors, savor the labor, of the ethanol gleamed from steam; dry cups, bottoms up, uninhibited dreams>>>

TesorseT's response:
>>>bereave chain link with intuitive superiority / fights the stupor of mental alcohol isms to bring me out of the negativity stream / I find concrete flows easily in the clean and clear complexities of my malleable reflections / I dissect reality like clothes from your body / inflecting from the hidden grin of my universal coat tail / ships sails stand tall as my erection for suspension of cognitive suggestion / creativity manifesting the work we do / you know it bares armor strong and mighty / and piercing bullets that rip hate right through / with a sly sneer smooth cap twisting steering a fly ride maybe a Bentley or Ferrari / under glow chrome hubs blasting mad dub plates fatter than that last girl you had i know you know she was faking / it's all good though we're just baking making mistakes and getting fresher with every step closer to the cliff but never racing / not to again slice the double negatives but never not learning expressing progressing / we got all kinds of vantages we take advantage of the views of other to expand our own horizons / we decide what we need what is positive / what pushes the borders is the kind of light that I ordered fuck yes sir I dig what's provocative / so gimme a mic and a pen a stage and a den / a now and a then and I'll show you what a word is when it's meant / where the minds blooming and moving as venom sound like when they bite down on your neck go hard and dig in / I mean no disrespect I just wanted to show you how the violence of my words is the beauty I live

As My Running Blood Keeps The Pace

My jaw drop sounds like the clip clop echo after the bass stops / my / breath goes shallow as every one of my six senses gets off / swells intensifies and tenses / I / melt like cheese and spilled milk messes / I need to get cleaned up like you're a wet mop sloppy as well clinging silk dresses / and I'm a guitar's nylon strings making your hips swing across the fret board like palm mutes and the first ring of this hot song's note stresses / contests and amplifies but never regresses / I must confess when you arc your back in time with the beat and every bounce and step you take / I'm blown over like ship's sails and a young girl's dollar store barrettes on top of shaking tresses / bird's houses that slip off the nail / a frail set of speakers about to blow their fuses and rickety fences / you're a forest fire in my hurricane / a long boarder's bloody bail and her nerve to get up and bomb that same hill all over again / I can't refrain from spitting my love for you like express post mail / my passion for you stains my face like war paint driven home hard as a fresh loaf of whole wheat in fast forward / fourteen succulent kisses later the bread's gone stale as a coal miner's whisper in a silent cave / sounds loud as a gailing wind blowing brave as the last mile of tracks and rails / the locomotive conductor's face goes pale as the road runs out / but I will not be afraid or scream or shout 'cause I know that everywhere at every time at my tanned and bare chested side is an angel //
there is you //

As I Reach My Reply

So what else is there?
I'm spinning a good yarn
and thus far the tapestry's coming along

I'm singing that bright song and yet ironically
it ain't got no words

still I hope ya heard everything I said
from way over by the crash of the curb
to the slashing of the mosh
the ever loving heat of the pit
to every comfort you found in bed
every sound in every phone in every tone in every head
the message / it remains the same
all ways in it's fullest colors never smothered or too bled

the conflicts for the most part they don't stick
they wash away while their residue sustains
the positivity like silence and chemistry a new mix
softened hues like my sober intoxicated new view
I found a new drink that offers proper cause
to my new bruised and opened eye moves
some pass off as a case of public drunkenness

but if love is illicit
then I think I'm just the bandit you're looking for
if it is unlawful to be high as a mother fucker
off my wordless passion I have for every brother
sun shine and moon light and all of creation
then I will gladly don the chains
and steel collar that the fearful have fashioned
and I will wear them 'til the last rising dawn
shake my split end tresses in time with the last note
of the last song the last words spoke / they carry on

desolate but not famished
my love remains but the body has vanished
the chains clamber to the ground / silent
my love speaks loudly / maintains resonance
the atoms never split stronger than the bomb
more resilient than the end
the apocalypse of my bright song

so what else is there?
my silence is proof
my body
not just external
my passion is eternal
as I reach my reply
my love is a fractal

The Reed's Note

I've got clothes that I own and I wear them fine
in water color and the shine of dawn cutting
a heavy stitch across my trousers
lowers my brow and hand full of flowers
level with the eye and glock embedded waist line
style bred of a violet horizon and violence
that only I have been the shark to witness
I recognize zen then as a pad of sound second nature
thirsty for the drink as a grape vine for the nurturing
via that which I know and what with a wonder
I could bereave the closing iris of day across egos chimera
and let away to the riviera 3 degrees off point of peninsula
perhaps describing one hot toke the penetration of a lung
the last rung sung from cottonmouths basest shelf the herbalists breathe the sun dodgers cleft chin split the stars and the reflection of the moon light off the sea's spite off my two eyes are the only halves that are left
the 2 litre coke bottom bursting like a parachute spent spread as a chemical's intent is well meant I'm only gaining speed and addicted to this shit but it's presence maintains pertinence in the wings of my you staring back at me from the fractaling ferns fingering the crevices between clouds
the past we lost track of we could only have once found open enough to have been right here right now shortly in the future while behind us we were blood hounds sniffing out the suture sewn shut at the end of our snouts
nostrils withheld hidden hues of the purples and oranges and green rusted doors hinges we followed by sight alone since choices I suppose find me with zero decibels worth of smell but in the modest hints of light glint off the might like a shadow of the teeth in my now extra mouth

that is the momentum of the note of the reed devoid of the never think this is what I seek a peace is the permanence a predicate of the seed wounder songs will fail to contaminate the hex and vibe the words and what I mean

the sun is all ways setting

concrete only bleeds when you pour a sip of OE on the street
for sensing the similar selves of me I become even as deceased

but no don't weep
the reed's note lingers on
the wolves and the sleep
meet where poltergeists digest rhythm
the apex of the sky
my one holy moment
palms pressing between solar systems
infinity has frozen

Feral I Is

I'm skitching on the last bus outta here's bashed in bumper
found four days later
floundering full head under rust on rubber
moss covered as the last day of my boss on mother
and I'm skitching the wish pit ravenous maul agnostic
with every single reason to back it / no bitching
cover all lands / a champion steady handed
the front and back of both hands believe that
non frantic what I take I do so cold headed
seemingly coming across spastic
I got tornadoes and tropic storms under control
like I don't need to be told chaos is passion
and nah I never planned it
the seeds scatter right where I need them
and from the jump that's the variable
that's what's aligned a ritual
yea that's what's random
rolling in tandem with the question
of legitimacy lost in the apex
of the individual's ceiling of intimacy
god is the numbers
hunkered down I got the gal's gown
and I'm familiar with the codex
so I'ma buck up
and show face blasted hotter than summer
better than a run of the mill truck stop mucker
popping pills butterflies in the steel grill no other
conflicts disguised butter in the pan fries
burn rubber out'a the cover and straight for the kill
I been taught so well by all of my brothers
and sisters my mother god bless the woman
who showed me how to build a wetter
fiercer / safer kind of shelter
scatter matter faster myself is the latter
like forlorn raindrops to bring the pieces together
the purpose of the hurricane cannot be forgot
feral I is and feral I begot
feral I is and feral I'm gone
feral I is and feral I begot
feral I is and feral I'm gone

Blue

My cigarette filter's tip is rough
and cuts my lip as I drag
pull away and cough

the stinging spot of blood
offers me a glimpse
a hint towards birthday ribbons

wishes pulled from my mouth
stifled by the smoke
and my last honest glint attempt
at finally
saying something beautiful.

I Only Want To Live Peacefully

Lukas Tesorset Ryder...is living for the betterment. is fucking finished. is just getting started. is living for you, for himself, for the earth, i just want my existence to help. food clothes shelter what is my part? where is my wealth?
...is fierce enough to allow everything hes done to accumulate into everything he'll be the man he's always wanted himself to be and it will only get easier because every day i learn for the first time what it means to know that i can do anything and im going to prove it right now. thats why i tell the government im a fucking terrorist. so that theyll watch and see the succession of one more soul that they cant have. watch me transpose and peel myself from the plexiglass of what you expect. keep the gun oiled and the temple clean shit snort and blaspheme let the heads cool and the engine run because in the end everything we do is just everything weve done.
give me myself. tonight. to light. a home that is right.
universe give me pride and honor and respect and strength and knowledge and confidence and hope and active potential and love and solace and integrity and trust and honesty and belief in my fellow man give me community and laughter and smiles that are ear to ear and never stop give me land to grow food that is as real healthy and worked for as the woman at my side you know she keeps me strong you know she keeps me hard give me unconditional passion give me forgiveness the capacity for a deeper hunger and the capacity to forgive give me a genuine understanding of myself as an individual myself as a direct influence and myself as a collective soul give me a place in the dirt give me sanctuary a jaw versed enough to defend with words spoken and stern enough to defend with bones blinding destruction upon the hate of my enemies and skulls broken but most of all universe give me truth and love and a humble head amongst it all. i am all things to all men.
...and he said, "i only want to live."

Glossy Eyed

When I look around it seems the finest minds I see are the tribes blazing weed like steam / getting chai eyed offa the green herb / on mossy knolls and street curbs / now to all the gals and blokes who toke by you wanna get high? / plant your ass on my grassy patch and we'll choke away on the endo and blunt smoke and we'll go where only gods know / and please believe that means that we know how to get glossy eyed like no other mother fucker does it better than I remember stoking potions at the ocean side / and I'm addicted to the feeling that I get inside when the families commune together / to not only revel in but create snatch plant and catch the vibe / whatever the weather / we'll collaborate / meditate forever and with our manifested will be done re-define moon light and what it means when a fight is won / and when the time comes / won't you come sesh with me? / come crush a couple of bottles of wine with me / torch up the hot knives in the hot night when it's all good it's all fine no worries no strife and no blight cuz it's all laughs when we

let the weed speed freely and we can breathe easy / spark that dub and sway blazin' breezy / come get glossy eyed while mossy knolls strolls by and we'll bounce to the rhythm of the earth as it's pleasing

cuz it's a celebration and I'm the celebrationist / narrating and documenting how the million facets of a single jewel grab a hold and run with this / but just because I got my pen to the page don't mean that I don't roast the sage a lot / I got a fist raised just the same as ya'll to toast what's hot smoke rose like spirits and ghosts blessing this sacred space we got / know that we made this moment and proved to ourselves and the universe that we can not only maintain but own it / and we owe it all to the earth and acknowledge this every time we set the ganj' a burn

so let the weed free and sing freely / spark that dub and sway breezy / come get glossy eyed while mossy knolls strolls by and we'll bounce to the rhythm of the earth as it's pleasing

now come on brother don't be stingy / bring the heavy buds the colt 45 and I'll bring the jazzy beauties with the clean lines / and no girl I ain't alluding to coke / I mean you with all them dangerous curves and me with ain't no brakes to choke / I'm so blown away by the grace you display / I'm so baked I got all this breath that you seem to take / and the days shoot by so fucking fast / when it's just me and you a bottle of jerry's and a bag of grass / so lemme take a moment to step back outta this haze
admire your subtleties / the slight in your sass
lemme revel in your presence for just a second...
wait what did I say? o yea that's right / take two and pass

Cut Throat I Know

I'm feeling shaky
but I know not a quarter percent half as bad as you be
the cracking pain in your knee the least of your worries
going on 48 hours and you've forgotten how to sleep
incapable of even day dreaming of resting easy
your mind's lost any reason to be stoked
you say you feel like dying
spirits weak and body choked / a vice within
tearing you apart from the inside outward prying
the bitterness ensues consuming
and I'm shocked silent
staring down the barrel of a temple
I was only passionate about worshiping in
but unbeknownst to me
I entered with tempered bombs
blasting from the lengths of my sleeves
hindered now
I was so distracted by your beauty
I ran in blazing forgot to remove my shoes
at the threshold
marking the temples glowing entrance
and when I open my eyes after the meditation
I look over my shoulder and find only desolation
at first lights reaction / I see no reason
to be blaming anyone but me
and as you burn to the ground you tell me
"this was no one's fault so stop with the sorrys
your apologies sounds are too loud
they compound / I just need to / lay down
I need you to / stay strong / sing songs
of positivity / of what's right cuz I already
know / what's wrong / the yolk around my neck
pulls on me like bull's horns invading my space
so babe / say to me anything optimistic
help remind me of my soul's strength
keep me in line with what's best of me
call me on my shit / keep me in check
babe I just need to hear your voice
but if you won't speak / I'ma beatbox
strum and ravage my gatbox and scream
really I mean no disrespect / no regrets
but babe I just need to hear your voice
so say to me anything say to me something
say to me anything or just shut the fuck up"

Right now it feels like there ain't
a lot I know inside of this holy moment
but i know the distance is killing me
and it's up to me to not only over come but own it
though I know that the second thing that I know
I guess it would be the third then considering
is that our passion has been stolen
by a fear of intimacy brought on
by the damage you have sustained
coupled in condemnation by an irony
we spoke of only in hushed tones
a scare we called pregnancy
a wavering uncertainty that breeds
a distance from you I am fighting
and the fourth thing that I know
is that I am winning / cuz I don't think
I fucking know that I can do anything
and I would let the streets run red
with the blood of our enemies to protect you
the fifth / we wished intensely from
the first moment our lips kissed and that is
that we would take this real love type love slowly
in retrospect perhaps we should have moved even slower
but I didn't recognize the vulnerability of inexperience
I told you I did and when I did even I believed it
but I guess I had more on you than just age
half a decade I thought didn't mean spit
but on second thought / on the sixth the seventh
the eighth thought ya know what?
my beautiful infinity my goddess my love?
fuck it
fuck all the thoughts and fuck the buts
fuck any and all doubt the reasons to give up
cuz we will only do everything
when we know that we can do anything
so I'ma cut the throat of the demon
that would take from us
our mutual lust and love
the single thing that meant the most to us
I'm stealing the passion back
I'm taking the passion back
I'm going to risk both our lives to get that passion back

Because I believe it's worth it
because I believe that with the unique love we create
we can bring into existence entire universes
that will bless all man kind and never leave us

and I also believe that there is hate
there is a hate that recognizes our potential
and will do fucking anything in it's power
to ensure that we turn against one another
to ensure for certain that we will crumble
we will be tested unlike anything we've ever known before
we will be brought to our buckling knees delirious and sore
we will be offered the suckling tit of what is easy
convinced that obligation
is synonymous with what we strive for
that us blooming is cavernous and sleazy
but when we want more we'll grab the rope
tap the lines with knowledge undeniable we are hope
personified in the great ocean we are white light
no words define the lightening we harness
but we work hard at finding the rhythm
we are the wisest we are the finesse
we are the finest we are the softest we are the hardest
because I believe that with the unique love we create
we can bring into existence entire universes
that will bless all man kind and never leave us
volcanoes erupting to tell you who is molten
just ask me and I'll tell you who's hottest
who's the choosen?
who's the softest?
who's the hardest?
who's the hardest?

Forgive

The vocoder
the ambient strings and transient pads
remind me of desolate landscapes
clutching a melancholy capable only
only in the winds and exhaust that I dream

cities left

shadowed

no one will ever see

this time

I cannot forgive

Grimoire

Stoned and pressed together under the over cast sky
I couldn't tell whether that
heart beat I was feeling was yours or mine

inside the air and soft rock's moss manuscript
of moisture manipulative with hold of our contour
capsize looking glass your dark eyes beyond mine
see the silver clouds far past the bottom grifting
grimoire over cast glinting glossy with the tree bodies
the monument of a waxingly waneful moment moves so fast

I literally lose track of where I end and where you begin
a packed bowls full and the last drop of resin
the side of a mirror the skies edges lack
a depth like sound my held breath reacts
four mouths fall beat in time...bound
Who's pulse is that?

...whoa.

Howl Zeppelin III (you know how it is)

Howling zeppelins scarring underbellies
texture reminiscent of mountain tops rubbed smooth
the fires still ember strongly / naturally

I find a new summit opposite the plateau
for us to create worlds still
simply under a sunset glinting aurora
in a tremulant of fresher hues
fractal jazz / the flora and fauna

what happens in the holding bay
of an cliff ward zeppelin when
there are no formations for its descension
besides the painting aft chain from the sky?
just let it hit the water

Howl Zeppelin II (you know how it is)

The same
dippings wet their wicks
on cuticle poems and vapor lyrics
flashed in a rain of passion
I can't help but clear my throat
of all this art I supposed
at the knees of our high tides
embankments disengage shone the brightest
when your radiance was nervous system electric
a murdering experience resurrecting a woeful womb
a joyful lambs hoof quartered as the moon
I fear that I will all ways love you fear
that I have been a victim to the comfort
my heart felt for falling I fear
that I do not fear because the weight
of a birth defect's disfigurement
is not a labor of uncertainty

adjacent the basement and rotting bones
a compliment for the molds growth knows not the edges

remember when the sheets starved us of our lower halves
we laid naked to the waist and breathing heavily
enough that the sun rose with each gaping laugh we stoked
loudly and wide smiled enough your eyes slivered slates like sun light
bereavement is a fiend thieving that this is something that you could ever deny

what to do with the shearing halves hemisphere broke the skin
what to do to give you planets atmosphere
what to do to separate the fault lines
what was less than you had
what was more was that I spat physics on the consistency
you quantum religious the two between could ever let you in?

Howl Zeppelin (you know how it is)

I drank you in a dream of tattooed isis ensembles
stuck my seeds in obituaries denied
and I cannot be certain of the dust I seen
click stacked under burden of their assemble

I read you amidst the quiver dogs teeth
anthropomorphic / the child inside relitigated
fevers at the touch of my surgeons hands described
as ions detracted amongst the chemical imbalance
and tinker heavy only since you've been at my side
indigenous I must remember your climate is not
binary not organic but crawling backwards as the
septic woman spoke / almost mythologically so
I cannot be one to back star any prevailed truth
surrounding legitimacy of your (yes, your) text feed

the wavering transparency
to your distracted eyes of my clawing walls
is the closest your molten aircraft to my quilled castle
that you will ever come

in a moat throat sung found torrential you are drunk

in a wrote horns contort to tones with no dead lies
compass is an island from which the center you will find no dye-rection
I must remain for you only as the foot note ascribes
I hope for your sake you one night find
a cedar clearing in the out stretch of your mind
brass malice encompass is an island from which the center heaves
with lust a trench I weave to the sounds of another day
I hoped that tomorrow I would still feel the same

I can only hope that tomorrow I will still feel

Kanvas Kuts

FOREWORD march / 'esir
we be boys flackin' spray paint
across the brick walls of a
thousand ear drums beats and
no I don't care what concerns are aired
what others words are spared
'cause I kut this canvas myself from bone and hair
ergo the organism is fucking fresh
like it just been packaged and not a scrap left
I sever words like toast totemed upon tonal originality
crowds leave the long haul for need of a nurse and triage...stat

so let's get on and engage this brutality
burbank battle school free from the rules
and stank of responsibility from the swamp tank
war mongers with no civility
and please believe presenting me with no thanks

hazy as gravy muckin' about blockhead fools
enunciated as maybes shout shuckin' lock stock
dangling body parts in the deep end of the kiddie pool
blizzards / what's my primary objective
victims / tell me what should be my next prerogative
and I'll tell ya where the venom lives
how to suck a teaspoon like sandpaper and rug burns
finger tips under shorts skirts that's the secret purse
where I keep my vented and fur lined wisdom
where I orchestrate information snuff films
organized and labeled in bottles like
once upon a time there was an encapsulated vision
spittin' refracted reflections of aerosol pistons
our inanimate manifested mystics scrawling
soul songs hung on about how

This system's missed missioned symptoms
since I must have missed the dissed spliff
between hot man and cold God's alienated cyst
trawled bogs called sissies fallen soggy crawls
with limp wrists lifted in a last ditch attempt
to iron out maybe scout or crisp up it's lisp
perhaps lynch a better sinched nerve
but It lacks the word
so God finds Itself perturbed
at me and what It thinks It heard me
spread whispers 'round the mulberry tree
rumors about non existent clits / clack
kinda like this but even more like that
useless shit's simple / just suckle
It's supple crippled crimp inch dick ever
since sought gifts been stacked *hack*
biffed off of lists *racked*
tricks like dogs rinse piss in a slovenly
rubber malleable as my last lobotomy
flustered summer's rot / can
however unfortunately the same place
I planned on pitching my pot / plant

Kanvas Kuts pinned a name on my rut
whether I like it or not
no matter which ways I sways
I'ma always stay the same ol' page
bustin' my gut onto the same blank page
so I'm lookin' for the difference
I'm lookin' for the pen
the free line on the brick wall that wont fall
where's my disturbance?
the wind that'll turn over
a new cover under my agin' hand?
where's my handle? where's my pan?
where's the foot in my sandle?
where's the worth in my grand$?

coincidentally the harvest came in star
and moon with the timing of the hot flash
stay crouched under the bullet sing bomb blast
not a single human left to arm or man
electrician's boiler suits cover up tattoos
skin deep proof born for a right to no life
needles and knives contrived
personified as blazed sluts covered up
robbed brats corrupt imagination barred
from what you know is phat / no trims cut
is the sly cat blissing under wide brimmed hats
slit but not scarred burning as blunts but not marred
grin soaking fronted methodies like harmonies
focused through a smoke stack and what's that
pulling cards like if trap's soft skinned snapped
beveled emboss / capped inside a tunnel
where it don't snow the dry wind knows
how to get me hard how stiff the smoke blows
off the project rooftops I dropped
leavin' notta but I ought'a disrupt the air waves
a beautiful mark on the concrete
an urban legendary memory is what I'll be
even in the wake of a 21 gun salute
offered by the 3 factions of the disillusioned
I hollered
"Something Has To Change"
...they stayed the same
and still hold my ghost in revery

Kanvas Kuts pinned a name on my rut
whether I like it or not
no matter which ways I sways
I'ma always stay the same ol' page
bustin' my gut onto the same blank page
so I'm lookin' for the difference
I'm lookin' for the pen
the free line on the brick wall that wont fall
where's my disturbance?
the wind that'll turn over
a new cover under my agin' hand?
where's my handle? where's my pan?
where's the foot in my sandle?
where's the worth in my grand$?

where's the payload that don't sink in sand?
the gummy hole that don't stink up my hands?
it's in the nervous knot's home of my stomach
full of your scent and starved to not vomit
drippin' from the inside of your ivory thigh
to the outside of my cobra arm / don't cry
just come back with fifty two coffers full
known how to get me off grab my hair and pull
black and blue and purple from the hard slap
light the candle and let the wick drip
a queen with a quart of rope a sharpened ace
a red jack a spade in your leaf hole
three thin blades a can of mace
extract
what we'll use as lace from dried seconals
glazed Bolivian marigolds a heavy haul carry 'em
bring 'em home and we'll get 'em sold
AHCK! derelict jettisoned not a single r-e-a-s-o-n
at the top of the trees faith rust and weather spoiled
emptied by the bottle full chug 'er back and get 'er done
I be fucked up enough to know how to construct a cuddle mold
a chariot spinning to the center of some better sun

cyclical and non nervous / bad habits
the core of the earth vows no protection
for anyone who pries from it's lands a hatchet
fresh moss / wet dirt / angled projections
and so what does that make of the best of us
molds of us from melted glass from tempered sand
and we are left with what becomes us
sly grins cut lips brass knuckles
a bad habit for collapsing canvas
broken fingers / satchels / buckles
tape decks iron necks and nails
that kinda shit breeds construction
reasons why I slug conduction at all
of the right mind and of the all tongue
the all seeing eye of art is the all blooming sky
of men and of women / of the old and the young
the all seeing eye of art is the all blooming sky
of where I can't seem to stop
so I paint a universe for myself
of a place where I can start
the all seeing eye of art is the all blooming sky
of where I just cannot seem to stop
so I paint a universe for myself
of a beautiful place where I can start

Kanvas Kuts pinned a name on my rut
whether I like it or not
no matter which ways I sways
I'ma always stay the same ol' page
bustin' my gut onto the same blank page
so I'm lookin' for the difference
I'm lookin' for the pen
the free line on the brick wall that wont fall
where's my disturbance?
whether I like it or not
I'ma always stay the same ol' page
bustin' my gut onto the same blank page
so I'm lookin' for the difference
so I'm lookin' for the difference
I'm looking for the difference

Monikers

Broken Arms
Tesorset
12 O'clock Patron
Mosse Knoll

You Can't See Me

The jasper swelled from where feathers sprung
to the size of gasping breathes took upon
ghosts cellophane telephoning my apartment
I swung free the door hinges
as to welcome in the poltergeists
but found myself so yellow I was orange
transparent as a spirit myself
a host hazel assumed neglected
the remnants reflection of fireworks
to the back side of floorboards and shelf
a nervous creaking sound a breeding ground
a mound crafted from the wood shavings
and kindling that once was my home
and viewing point for the singes singing strings
now only fuel for the hunger of my ghostly brethren
spark toothed and angling fervent
a mistake sewn too late
I was ripped apart by the memory of my torment

oh how I cried for a chance
for what I claimed a right to overstep the threshold
of my spaciously overpopulated inferno
from the inside to external mount abode collapsible
I denied the lie intent remappable
I'm just the fuck out for a 2/6
and a bottle of cream soda we can use as mix
I'ma cop from the neighbors house
so don't worry bout pitching
keep your flaming benjamins
for breakfast in the morning
'cause by then I'll be devoid
of all known dollars and cents
inhibitions and recompense
from this hangover moment
I'll wear my soul on the outside as a warning
I've learnt so much about where demons reside
not stone still they travel with the beautiful fates
in the misconstrued clockwork faces of omens
in the poetry I have yet to write to spite all things
postdated erased and only when I say so stolen

I'm only visible when I let you see me
though the sun glares off'a my ghostly teeth
in the poetics seething that's not me and a pen
breathing but dejavu off your 6 side sneaking
and those are the only glances you get for free
so take the time to appreciate the appreciation
I have for that though you can't see me
I could let you if I was feeling just as I appreciate
you could see me any way if you were needing

wheeling heated in case of metamorphosis
congregated longly a lone am I? dice less
gimmick free I no longer have anything to hide
try this on for size varies depending on what room
the back draftery apparitions beseech would I
lend my airy conscientious to any weaponry
or words deterred off might of the truth be heard
freedom of speech becomes secondary
when another conscious fire and teeth
subside drip into inside of all of me revived
so this is what it's like to exist without living
this is what they meant by an ocean of seedlings
taking appendages amending no real consensus
as to the dimensions or composition of my mindscape
as I've written before so I will scribble again
is there an emotive motive not biased towards
a hard lust whether all loving or brazen sore?
is there a poet inside me that is not a metaphor?
what becomes of my loneliness?
my solitude is done for
whatever ends that means
I assume the position of a
tremulant's waxed offering throat chord
waning / a sigh of relief
I am thankful for my potential for understanding
my opacity is not without heart scars
fluctuates my jaw phonetically
flash in the shown sun dark
picks me out a single fluttering orb
take me or leave me my solitude is done for
whatever ends that means waxing / waning
maybe never beginning or ever ending
a sigh of relief / whatever that means

my solitude is done for

2 bright stars / infinite new lungs

Those shaking tresses of hair.
A cumulus cloud of onyx hydra spirals
like a universe surrounding the goddess
brought into illumination by the glow of your face.
The breeding novas of your eyes
pull me into the silhouette of your gravity,
and I am crushed by an obliterating
high of the drug that you are.
Crushed by the weight of
the storm that you personify,
by the implosion of one star into another.
The encapsulating inversion of the
invention of vision we are manifested as.

As two vessels let go of time and space
they will let go of the atoms between one another.
As they let go of the very earth beneath them
2 bright stars explode, then vanish in a vapor.

The sound of laughter rips through
what would be called forever as I cannot tell
where I end or where you breathe in.
In the space of two hearts synchronized palpitations,
worlds are created as lungs vocalize, and limbs begin.

Don't Even Speak

and this dawn knows
war
don't know woe

but this dawn knows


and this dawn knows



cuz this dawn knows




that this dawn knows



.

Justice

HIS hisses like miscarriages
takes loving words like disses
mulled over like slumlords like marriages
like he don't know the difference
between backs of hands and kisses
less like mathematics
more like thugs hits in the crisp darkness
permissive like taking lover's swords
to teutonic submissives
fall to the floor in a manic steez
buckles and collars never electronic
but a brackish breath phonetically they breathe
to my arrestment not surprisingly
all things literal seem a lot like analogies / lately
as of late me like barracudas and pikes
the pope himself and the next door dyke
the swing and the hit / the miss
the feedback on the mic
the drift between shutting the hell up
and screaming something that at least scares myself
directly under the head of my lucky strike
like reaching for the thirteen
but only ever achieving the twelve
still I hope I found what I always wanted
my heart the hammer the hieroglyphs the level
the shelf like what with A-bomb impact
like morse code ripples like mischief magma
hot spots I've delved / the sulfur pools
still but non stagnant
like hotels neon signs full flicker but not vacant
like eyelids dome over empty space where the eyes lived
not a victim even as eyeless cries can I get a witness?
like treason like the convergence of seasons frees
every man woman and child can exist without grievance
like fried chicken pleases every milado / that's me
that's you / that shy cat slinkin out the back door
feelin' left out / perhaps lonely
but man should know you're never alone
wherever be one introvert there's two more
just around the bend beyond the corner
lookin' to bust out excrete their soul
share their sores and together we can all soar
hands are oars stroking the subversive like
the now reminds me of the when
the has been reminds me of the end
like I can become all things to all men
only then the like becomes the is
I'm learning to take the loving words
like what they are / as love
ain't no disses
like I don't need adjectives anymore
to describe what from love slid
what love said what love did
what love meant
like love / I just is.

FLiP

I'MA Flip my priorities 'fore I spit my authorities.
Contemplate the majorities 'fore I underwrite their moralities.

Curb whomp and blaspheme my own for the sole sake to bend back the bone.
Watch the clean steam burn the skin.
Embrace the truth of my disfigurement.
To reveal the tones nothing is permanent.

But I still have sewn scars that dictate the permanence of my exponential consistence in the harvest of my betterment.

a lone forest I plant as a metaphor my state as a hip-hop punkrocker in search of the wandering home I can befriend.
My permanent residence.

No I cannot stop wondering what'll happen to the rest of me.
I shovel slop 'cause I know it's in the dirt I'll discover the best of me.
Know I don't care if it hurts.
Watch me spit rhymes even during intense torture delivered in spurts.
Set me on fire and before I can tire I will swing my head back and still show you my worth.

I live as I die.
I heal as I hurt.
I am high in the sky as I am brooding in the mirth.
Cursed but not hexed. Earless but not deaf.
Taken rhyme as a token
warmly stolen but not theft.
Bled out of quantity never of quality
never a haughty worry and no mess.
Sightless but still blessed.
I don't need to speak. I don't need to stress.
I'll slaughter a thousand to show you the creation that's LEFT.

A Fire's Coma

Passed out in the cold of your days

you left your last note for us to hold in our veins

passed out in the cold of your days

you left your last note for us to hold in our veins

I know people die all the time but you were never supposed to

dwindle live off of my fire don't spindle

into a space where you're incapable of complaining

you never shut off the lies before

that's the truth of the matter don't matter now

just speak to me / say to me anything devoid

regardless of any scores we had to settle

any sores forelorn now not what's testing our mettle

it's the kettle of your body I'm certain we both feel pinned in

but I understand I can never fully understand the difference

'cause I'm feelings haughty

and I'm sure you're feeling haunted if anything

the ghosts are battling

crackeling against the walls of your rattling breath

contest for what's left

of your dripping best in show courtesan rose fluids

rows of tubes imbued from nostrils and mouth / hot holes

exhume from your wavered invaded no longer so sacred chest

don't stress

the chemicals will act as they're supposed to //

blow. through. vampiric daylight.

dire. mating. left me here.

faux. color. out of sorts. pint of beer.

circular but not connecting you strove / too hard to circumvent drunk on spirals I wish you could have known how to bend to the winds of my love / arteries only collapse when shoved / I wish you knew / I wish you wouldn't try so hard if not I might know you do / clogged hops hipping come on and sit up pop / you awaken with break neck speed / lucidity only means that you get you're dreaming / hello father / good bye daughter / farewells fuck like peace and empty titles / sign the deed / extinguish the death of flame in the reflection of a clockwork's face your time remains unbeknownst subtly obscene and idle / farewells lift luck like elephants onto one quarter inch mantles / I am an unsettling sabretooth unhandled mammals that size sure cannot rest on the weight of a one life stain / tell me what's the pain / what's the song / what went wrong / where's the manhole / dendrites of your supposed to's fractal my presence into old dreams where I wept into the canals of the mind's maze / passed out in the cold of your days you left your last note for us to hold in our veins

passed out in the cold of your days you left your last note for us to hold in our veins.

Let the Blood Clot

The verdict is jettisoned derelicts conscious of their right to life and individual licks whisper wet like what with one single breath / understood what's underneath the stretchered hood of righteousness / indignation subservient with a harsh lisp / tongueless with a single kiss / you hope the silence is blessed / wrists creak loudly enough for them to become words an utterance you can make out over the buzz but the mind sighs fuzz / coddled ambiance microscopical ambulance / now let the sirens take you / don't raise a single nail / or lift the plank / you've failed to file / down the layers breathe deep and all ways stale / let the blood clot / the stress escapes like screams and steam / a team of waiters deemed my organs clean / while bored and waiting but what they mean is that your veins are empty as the streets beam light white blinding / bending broken in the knees melt into the concrete juxtaposed along the glass store burning building reflected in your half full eye I seem to see mine / and I am afraid / and I am afraid not that there is no difference between us now but that there never was in the first place / I lose a sense of my in/div/idu/ality / my control of chaos and whatever was random / today is what I miss the most / let the blood clot as if there is only ever tomorrow / in the present future the human with no body is king nobody is king / so let the blood clot / nobody is king nobody's asking / let the blood clot let the blood clot / I am not me and today never existed so the wound remains clean...
...let the blood clot.

Why I am Monogamous

So i was talking with 'tasha last night and said some things i dont think ive ever thought about quite in this way before. I feel the need to expand on those thoughts as I believe they are nutritious mind/soul food for all of you as well as myself and 'tasha.

You do not have the right to say that I am yours
and I do not have the right to say that you are mine
But I give you the privilege to say that I am yours
and you give me the privilege to say that you are mine
and since some times we do not feel as if we deserve the happiness
and love we feel for and from our partner so this privilege is truly an honor at all times
because we are only ever in this because we want to be
it is a choice to give an aspect of ourselves
an aspect of the power allowed by our individuality
to the means to an end (or endlessness) of a complete circle
when we are honest and giving of our power to our partner
we find that we harbor and exude more than we ever thought possible.

and i know you would not be mad if i fell into temptation and slept with someone else
but that is not the point
it is not the fear of your disappointment and anger that keep me from doing so
I stay my ass out the temptation pool because I recognize that my feelings for and want of you are deeper and stronger than my carnal lust because I know that inside my mind regardless of what my cock may say sometimes I don't want anyone but you. you have given me the privilege to say that you are mine and I honor that.

Slash

Tesorset your
partner in crime
testing organic sets
Poet-Dash / your sly cat
your face painted warrior
accurate / firm / soft handed
from beauty to violence
and back again in a flash
I won't protect you from fury
but I will let the streets run red
as I fight beside you / for you
I am at your command
and on my knees / just as I know you are
when battle formations require me to stand
well I'll grasp the scalp and you can take the scalpel
we'll be wide eyed and dripping from the chin
wet across the lip slow motion as the spatter
from throats of our enemies we'll let 'em breath
not with ease but set 'em free and let 'em bleed

I'm so artful when I'm the corner king
you the blazing arrow sharpened sting
the keystone queen / soulful songs emanate
from shadows pursing out behind your teeth

in the echo of the last blade needed
clanging against the concrete
from between our clasped hands
the heavy pant of your breath
in the ankle deep crimson afterglow

I find mine follows a single half note
differentiated from your own
creating a beat leaving dissipation ripples
in the wake of pooled footprints
that trace our light after the war steps
we settle into the near silence
timbre / the wavering voice of tomorrow
the mid tones / veins ribbon elation and lace
the bass / the space between my right eye
and that of your left as we depart side by side

you're so pretty when you blether me
you're just so beautiful when you scream

I pour you a hot bath that night
underneath the dead oak tree
sponge the dried blood from your skin
the crusted sweat from the corners of your eyes
comb the heavy knots from your hair with my fingers
I bandage your wounds with my strong hands
and wrap my arms around you like
if I do so tight enough there will be no worry
that the next war will ever take you away

in turn you do all of the same for me
you're so beautiful when you blether me
you are just so pretty when you scream

Yesterday.

The most honesty I feel I could continuously
contribute to any given moment is that of silence.
My words remain the accent
drawing (int/)attention
but by no means encompass
the entirety of my work.

/

There are moments where I fall into
a land of space of eyes between us
where I swear I could look into yours forever.

Satya Symptoms

And I was all of the grass and what could have been
I was the hope born of said sought since crass eluded brethren
a leather man cracking temperament frail like caustic claws
veil shining on the backside of animals we bled for tournament
tails torn from the serpentine throat fangs scratch roads
once slithered along by better men
washed out along the shore
bellies rubbed sore for I could no longer afford the rent
too socked and spent talons subjugated at the knuckle
tampered with and bent / scarification my only language
heavy transcribed to be raw / real in rags we dress deeply meant
unkempt the space between the walls thinning my cheeks
widens my jaws / the pressure on floorboards
hardly enough at this time for the movement of self
shingles sapped our cottonmouths in the dry of night
racked these souls for and of all that is right
sacked a cloth bag of embers across my sight
what I whispered was the light at the end of the path behind me
something disdain / I never looked at never noticed again
since this day forth when I put aside me any worries of the plight
when the virus died inside me
when i thought what was might
was the things I could touch around me
the winds pushing downwards falsely
convinced me of the longevity of gravity
'til the infant creature fell out of my hands
upwardly
happen stance gingerly poised kickstands
metaphors of euthanasia not imagery
well it may not be the virus but something has to die tonight
sate hitam satyam / the virus trust me is digital
satya based in organia and salvation the push and the light
well it may not be the virus but something has to die tonight
but I will only go out once the wind has blown by just right
when I reach out my hand in confidence and say "it is done
and any setting sun of sickness *phst* it can keep the victims
the half empty syringe of my nervousness and my spite"

hardened softly rituals

for 'tasha

The vicious vixenish veneer I was originally
attracted to, to my surprise does not fade
even as the lazy days spiral the crazy shades only intensify
I touch what's touchless and find its grime and sheen to be real
even behind closed doors her inner lime light shines (outwardly)
I can tell this because even in the darkness laying on mattress
I find myself a certain clarity and am almost childishly frantic
for the glint in her half opened almond shaped eyes (wholly)

I pass twin mountain peaks and cumulus clouds
that open onto blazing cool landscapes
my stolen breath circulated
this could be infinity

endtroducing...

From listening to the silence I just knew what to do
I mainly taught myself
I would like to at least continue
to be able to express myself as best as I can
I'm an instrument
and I feel like I have a lot of work to do
still
and I'm a student and I'm also a teacher
originally it started with the hurt in my head
which really I guess was confusion
but the confusion hurt
I didn't understand at the time where these feelings came from
so I started looking for a way out
I began analyzing them under the looking glass holding the pain in my hand and meditating intensely upon it to the point where the acknowledgment almost made everything much worse but I was intent on understanding my relationship to this feeling of abandonment I felt from the world around me after long terms of study and experimentation with the hurt I noticed that if anything I was only getting more lost so I began to question if I couldn't eradicate the pain without eradicating myself why could I not turn the hurt in on itself use it to my own ends so the meditation and dissection of what I considered a virus continued even to this day I don't know where it came from but I remember what it was like to feel infected I remember what it was like to want to die I think primarily what kept me from going over that edge was how intrigued I really was by it it was almost sadistic I suppose a twisted fascination with the lust I felt for the destruction of myself I mean is it not a part of the human condition to strive to live on? weren't people programmed to fight for survival and not intermediate demise? this contradiction was at best overwhelming to say the least.
I have taken blades to my body and introduced too many painkillers to my system and nudged myself down flights of stairs none of this was a cry for help but rather research to see how the confusion would react to being brought within reach of, well, the death it told me I wanted. i hate myself and i want to die. i love myself and i want to live. a constant yo-yoing of consciousness i watched with an almost playful amusement. anyway as the study continued I noticed that in the blackest shadows of my depression images literally would fade in and out of the shadows figures and figments that would rise from the sand and disappear just as quickly for reasons still unknown to me these images were best manifested as words as opposed to drawings or paintings or any primarily visual forms which one would assume they would be considering i was interpreting literal images i would see before my eyes when the blackness was complete where it would hurt the least and the most i found that not only was this a new way of studying and meditating and trying to understand emotions i didn't have a name for but that it also acted as a kind of exorcism i would paint the scenes i saw with words and as i did they would dissipate until i was left alone by them temporarily free from the hauntings i could write and create the depictions as something i could see in front of me and then do with it what i pleased put the demons on the page and close the book and lock them away far away from myself exorcism truly is the word to describe what i was doing to/for myself.
it has been 9 and a half years since i first wanted to die. it has been 9 years since i began painting my demons with words.
From putting my hand into the shadows
I just knew what to do

I mainly taught myself
I would like to at least continue
to be able to express myself as best as I can
I'm an instrument a student and a teacher
I will write a poem and then learn what it is about through my writing I am taught things I did not know I already knew I have come to the point where i exist as a channel through which god/satan/angels/demons/spirits/guides/whatever speak through. while clearly what is to be said is entirely translated through me and the eyes with which i see i do understand that there is greater meaning and that a lot of that meaning i believe is universal as we all exist as tones within the same song. i am truly wept onto my knees and humbled by the gift i have been given. the gift of critical exploration of the self as tangible lessons relative to all. i step unknowingly into the hurricane in the hopes that some day we won't have to. it is a blessing to share my work and see tears bled from eyes and head that bob with understanding. it is a blessing to have been told and to know my work helps people save themselves helps people through hard times helps people understand...
i now know the that same familiar feeling not as confusion causing hurt but as a hunger as a quest for fire to step beyond the realms of human understanding and come to grips with not just mine but with the place where we all belong. every time i hold fast my pen and speak again i am befriending every time i step behind the mic i am transcending and i now do so not as an individual but as a river flowing wide and freely to be taken or left as any soul chooses.
I would like to at least continue
to be able to express myself as best as I can
I'm an instrument
and I feel like I have a lot of work to do, still. my potential is limitless and my hunger is infinite.
if you have ever bought my books or cds, or let me spit at your house party, or seshed with me in alleys and under stairwells, on living room floors, read my blog, seen my set or asked on the poem tattooed around my left forearm know that you have given me one more opportunity to sharpen my teeth, know that you have willingly or unwillingly taken my hand in that moment as i opened my mouth and declared that you alongside me care where we go from here.
it's like were all dreaming the same dream so take me to a place unlike anything I've ever seen
unlike anywhere I've ever been a place inside where we know what we can be where we know what can be reached we just need to confide in that the deliverance of the beauty of life is based in our conscious projection of willful change and of mind and we will explore space

together
both inner
and outer
in peace
forever

Longboarders in the Night

for 'tasha

If I could bleed through the skies like microphone mesh
you would hear the songs I am singing to you
like 60 minute heart beats wound up with no stress
if I could race the very sun
and win and still never wear out my kicks
I know you would already be in the grass of the next morning
smiling gentle eyed like the goddess you don't know you are
in the morning day light the sunshine
slits in through the kitchen window across
the living room floor and glints in your eyes like stars
but I must admit that I've been up since seven and haven't napped
so I don't know how far I'm going to be able to run
but still it is so exciting just the same
so much so that it feels like I'm going to explode
with anticipation at the thought of the chase
so in preparation I jacked a 2/6 of sailor jerrys
slammed it back blazed a blunt lit a smoke
imagined your hand on my throat
teeming as the needle before the plunge
knuckles tighten before the choke
and in the soundlessness of the blaring
of the countdown just before lift off
I see the prime time crook in the corner of your mouth
as your eyes lessen/listen to the 60 hours
of my heart pounding too fast for my own good
but keeping a steady pace with the good of your own
60 minutes of my chest crashing
compress into 60 milliseconds of the slide ways sly grin i reflect
not knowing that all along you were the mirror
and I am beginning to ramble beginning to feel dizzy
and my words must be clouded and unclear
like a drunk with his gamble on account of
I am so fucking high off you
it would be impossible for me to drive so take the wheel and steer
and true neither of us may ever come down completely
but don't worry we'll trade off every 6 hours
or on the inbetweens when we are peaking
which needless to say at this point
is probably going to be most of the time
and ya know if we could we would slam the petal to the floor
and do our best to fly 'cause fuck yea we like to go fast
and sure we like to party but we also live inside a city
so for the sake of responsibility and at least
our parents peace of mind and our own physical safety
fuck the car
get on your kicks grab your deck
a dirty 20 for supplies on the way
your grand dads bag of weed (leave a note trust me he'll understand)
cigars clenched between our teeth let out a scream
take my hand and let's FUCKING GO!
let's bomb this hill like it's the only one that exists
let's bomb this hill blindfolded
like we actually know whats around the bend
let's double on one skate with our hands on eachother's eyes
realize we can do anything / actually
not with blind faith but wide eyed knowing
home done ink bleed from our feet / lets ignite
roadrash naked hips side by side
longboarders torching off weightless / airy / light
longboarders torching off / long long long into the night